Our God is BIG!

This weekend was a little better for Nikki but the majority of last week was difficult for her. In addition to starting on the new oral chemo, she is slowly coming off the Cortisone too. Each time she reduces the dose, she gets withdrawal symptoms and all sorts of nasty side effects.

She once again finds herself in the position where she needs to make a decision about her treatment going forward. Should she continue on the Mabthera (an experimental chemo she takes 6 monthly, mainly to try to alleviate the aggressive arthritis) or not? It seems to have done wonders to help her joints and mobility over the last 6 months, but she is not sure whether this has been the reason for the recent developments of the disease in her liver and brain. Because she is an "experiment", doctors are not able to give her an answer or even to recommend a way forward. The decision is hers entirely. It seems that she is leaning towards going without the medication at this stage.

In the tough times, it is always tempting to focus on the problem / disease and, in our minds, our fear of it can outweigh our fear of God. When I was out running recently, the words of a song playing on my iPod helped to re-align my focus, as I got a whole new revelation of who God is and what He is able to accomplish. I began to shift my focus on to God, on to worhipping Him and thanking Him instead of directing all of my intercession and energy into problem / disease. He is so big and so awesome, beyond description. This Psalm says it so well:

Psa 97:1 - 6:

"The LORD reigns, let the earth be glad; let the distant shores rejoice! Clouds and thick darkness surround Him; righteousness and justice are the foundation of His throne. Fire goes before Him and consumes His foes on every side. His lightning lights up the world; the earth sees and trembles. The mountains melt like wax before the LORD, before the Lord of all the earth. The heavens proclaim his righteousness, and all the peoples see his glory.

It reminds me of this little saying:

"Don't tell God how big your problem is, tell your problem how big your GOD is!"